Quill Takes Flight

7 Shades of Amber

Sometimes I feel like I’m not a person – I’m more like seven people, all clamoring to control my brain for a period of time.

“What the devil is going on in there!?”

Meet the seven Ambers:

(1) Save-the-world Amber. The original Amber. Says “Good morning!” and smiles while passing strangers. Unabashedly trusting.

Likes: giving people gifts, random acts of kindness, spending time “in nature”, volunteering, spirituality, philanthropy, daydreaming.

(2) Artsy Amber. Gets along well with save-the-world Amber. Sometimes they even share brainpower.

Likes: scrapbooking, blogging, traveling, reading, learning, and writing.

(3) Nerdy Amber. Has seldom been seen for years, but made a significant reappearance since Diablo III was unleashed (excited nerd term for released).

Likes: gadgets and toys, comic books, board games, video games, card games, action/sci-fi/fantasy.

(4) Actually-kind-of-cool Amber. Emerged sometime in college, I think. Obtained a significant number of non-shitty friends that don’t care about her sexual orientation. Occasional self-confidence surges not seen in other models.

Likes: parties, dancing, martial arts, hanging out, laughter, tequila, darts.

(5) Girly Amber. Very shy around nerdy and actually-kind-of-cool Amber.

Likes: window shopping, dressing up, cupcakes, bubble baths, decorating things, happy endings.

(6) STRESSED-OUT Amber. Tyrant who, once in power, often forgets/ignores the other Ambers awaiting brainpower. Generalized ANXIETY, overinflated sense of RESPONSIBILITY, and unwarranted GUILT complex.

Likes: taking on more than she can handle, overachieving regardless of merit or recognition, CAPSLOCK.

(7) Robot Amber. Otherwise known as Safe Mode. Takes over once STRESSED-OUT Amber has been pushed to the breaking point. Not very personable. Has only remained in power long-term once, in the life era now referred to by all other Ambers as “The Great Emptiness”.

Likes: being efficient.

So there you have it: the inside scoop behind my mind wars. Sometimes alliances are forged over commonalities, like when save-the-world Amber and girly Amber tear up together watching movies with the motif “love conquers all”. Most of the time though, it’s just one of the first five dueling STRESSED-OUT Amber while the other four cheer from the sidelines and pray that Robot Amber remains unplugged.

So, what kinds of crazy are in your brain?

Tags: blogging, life, Love, psychology, self, Stress, writing

Comments 4 Comments
Categories Humor, Lists, Writing

Mother’s Day Letter

7 May

This blog’s name (QuillTakesFlight) actually came from a line in the following letter, written for my mom last Mother’s Day. This year, I’m sharing it with other mothers and daughters.

***I just wanted to add that I’m very proud of how far my mom has come since this time last year. She is happier, healthier, and stronger. She has reclaimed her life.

Mother’s Day Letter

Writing is my gift and this is the most important thing I’ve ever written, so

if this letter can’t save your life, I will write you an epic in iambic pentameter

if the epic can’t, a book

if the book can’t, an anthology

and if the anthology can’t, I’ll never write again.

Because, you see, the feathers of my quills will string together and take flight

into the boundless skies of inspiration

leaving me behind.

You know that when I’m lost beyond thought, I always go to you.

How could I create a sentence without thought?

How could I write without sentences?

What good are my words without you listening?

Please never say again, “I wish to leave, I have nothing” because

My sister, mom, and me.

we’re here and we need your self,

even if your self is broken

even if you’re sick of your self

even if you hate your self

even if you forgot your self

after so many years of trying to be selfless.

Even if you’ve lost your self, mom,

remember what we always said to each other?

You can’t lose me.

That was our song.

Didn’t you mean it?

Please never walk away.

Walk with me as far as you can walk,

then crawl with me when you can’t walk,

then sit with me when you can’t crawl,

and we’ll remember how far we traveled together.

And when the time comes,

I will carry you off into the sunset,

wherever you wish to sleep.

This is not that time.

You know you can’t lose me.

I won’t lose you either.

Reclaim yourself.

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–

The world would never be the same without her.

Tags: blogging, children, daughters, depression, inspiration, life, Love, Mother's day, mothers, Parenting, poetry, writing

Comments 5 Comments
Categories Poetry, Writing

My Simple, 5-Step Creative Process

27 Apr

"Imagination... is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world." -Einstein

Because if my process was too complicated, I’d never write anything.

1) Say it. Get your idea on the page. This is the absolute hardest step for me. For some reason, I like to hoard my stories and characters in my mind until they build up and burst out belligerently, sort of like Athena.

The Birth of Athena

2) Say it to someone else. Ask for a fresh pair of eyes, or a few pairs. I recommend finding someone who 1) you trust with your ideas, 2) knows something about the subject matter, 3) will be brutally honest, and 4) cares – because, let’s face it: a lot of people are busy. You don’t want that manuscript laying there for the next year waiting to get to steps 4 and 5.

I don't recommend asking someone with whom you only communicate through Facebook.

3) Say it better. Also known as “Re: Step 1″. Re:visit, re:read, re:word, re:think, re:organize, re:work, re:write, re:do. (Re:ally stopping – you get it.)

Craft your creative world in new ways.

4) Say it to everyone. You didn’t get to Step 4 just to let your story sit hidden in a drawer forever did you? I find this step almost as difficult as step 1. But perfectionism must stop somewhere. Be bold!

A written-out-reviewed-edited-idea is a terrible thing to waste.

5) Say something else. Never stop imagining new things.

"Imagination... is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world." -Einstein

I’d love to hear from different types of artists (writers, painters, photographers, etc.) – do you have a similar or a completely disparate process?

—————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Photo credits: Wikipedia, http://www.psfk.com, http://www.layoutsparks.com, http://ctlkevinblog.blogspot.com (Google images),

Tags: art, blogging, community, creativity, editing, einstein, imagination, inspiration, life, story, writing

Comments 3 Comments
Categories Lists, Writing

Eating Your Venom

17 Apr

You were shiny, you were new.
Then you cracked, I was glue.
What you knotted, I’d undo.
What you needed, I pursued.
If you tore, I could stitch.
When you broke, I would fix.
If you crumbled, I could patch.
When you stumbled, I would catch.

You leave me, I follow.
You poison, I swallow.
You cry, blame the stars, the past.
I can take it, I can last.
Take your swings, I can duck.
Tear me down, I’m still stuck.
Shred my wings and laugh out loud.
Hold them up to please the crowd.

I am humbled, I am broken.
I am words that hate to be spoken.
Love is bruised, body worn.
Patience thin, mind is torn.
I hope you fly, hope you soar.
Wish you peace and so much more.
You don’t learn, you won’t hear.
Don’t fall now, I’m not near.

Tags: challenges, life, Love, poems, poetry, relationships, writing

Comments 4 Comments
Categories Poetry, Writing

What Can the Dead Do?

26 Mar

I started this poem a few years ago in a creative writing class. I couldn’t get it out of my head today because I just learned that the father of a close friend is passing. So I decided to finish it.

What Can the Dead Do?

They can rot, says her father,

ever the realist,

burying his grief.

Nothing more.

They can haunt you,

whispers her fearful aunt,

ever the believer.

You’d better behave!

They can glow in the dark

says her brother excitedly,

turning out the lights expectantly.

Do you see anything?

They can destroy you,

cries her desolate cousin,

heartbroken long ago,

still self-absorbed.

They can protect you,

mumbles her grandmother,

though she never planned

to outlive her own daughter.

And she knows that they can’t

hold her hand,

laugh,

read her stories,

or take her to school.

But she wishes,

surrounded by family,

that someone would tell her

they still can be beautiful

and joyful

and proud.

———————————————————————–

To anyone who has lost or is losing someone dear, my thoughts and love go out to you.

Tags: death, dying, family, grief, life, loss, Love, poems, poetry, writing

Comments 2 Comments
Categories Poetry, Writing

Blog Reconstruction

21 Mar

I have decided that is time for major blog reconstruction.

I started this website with the idea that blogging would help me with my writing. Unfortunately, I didn’t have any real focus, so I wrote about anything and everything (and sometimes nothing in particular). It’s a lot of fun to just post whatever-the-hell-I-want-’cause-I-paid-for-this-domain-name-damn-it.

But, to be honest, I’ve still been avoiding my actual writing.

From this point forward, QuillTakesFlight is going to make an active effort to have posts about my fiction/prose/poetry-writing. I’ve been wanting to make the change for months, but fretting about it so much that I stopped posting altogether. I guess I’ve been worried that I will alienate some of my (few) readers by changing my content focus. But I really need to find my way back to the real reason that I created this blog. Hope you guys stick around with me, though.

If you enjoy my miscellaneous list-making and completely irrelevant tangents, never fear. Those are going to another place… However, this time, they’ll have a focus. Hooray for forethought!

Hope you’ve all been well. See you around the blogosphere.

Tags: blogging, life, writing

Comments 3 Comments
Categories Writing

Happy New Year, Indeed – Finally. Getting. Our. Own. Place.

5 Jan

Call me crazy, but I have never quite felt comfortable embracing my generation’s philosophy of move-back-home-with-mom-and-dad. They call us “the boomerangers”. I call us the ones who entered the job market at exactly the worst possible time. To-MAY-to, to-MAH-to.

Anyway, I’ve taken care of myself for a while now, so it seemed like a few steps backward. Bottom line: I did not want to do it (though I was very grateful).

My past year (and a month) looked a little something like this:

December 2010. Graduate from college! Hooray me!
January 2011. Live with Sara at her mom’s place. Work at Victoria’s Secret. Job-hunt like a fiend. Dream about our own place.
April 2011. Acquire “real” job as a technical editor/writer. Begin dropping hints about our own place.
July 2011. Sara acquires better job. Begin begging shamelessly for our own place.
August 2011. Sara (the rational one) explains that we ought to stay with her mom as long as possible, to save as much money as we can before moving into our own place.
November 2011. Sara’s mom retires and will move to New Hampshire in the spring. Begin hunting for our own place.
December 2011. Become convinced that there are exactly zero affordable, non-terrifying, non-disgusting 1-bedroom apartments in Northern Virginia within DC-commuting distance… with a washer and dryer, please?
January 2012. Sara’s and my 3-year anniversary. Hooray us! With the annual naivety that is New-Year’s-Zeal, recommence the hunt. ACTUALLY FIND SEVERAL APARTMENT OPTIONS.
March 2012. We will have our own place.