Sometimes I feel like I’m not a person – I’m more like seven people, all clamoring to control my brain for a period of time.
Meet the seven Ambers:
(1) Save-the-world Amber. The original Amber. Says “Good morning!” and smiles while passing strangers. Unabashedly trusting.
Likes: giving people gifts, random acts of kindness, spending time “in nature”, volunteering, spirituality, philanthropy, daydreaming.
(2) Artsy Amber. Gets along well with save-the-world Amber. Sometimes they even share brainpower.
Likes: writing, scrapbooking, blogging, traveling, reading, learning.
(3) Nerdy Amber. Has seldom been seen for years, but made a significant reappearance since Diablo III was unleashed (excited nerd term for released).
Likes: gadgets, toys, comic books, board games, video games, card games, action/sci-fi/fantasy.
(4) Actually-kind-of-cool Amber. Emerged sometime in college, I think. Obtained a significant number of non-shitty friends that don’t care about her sexual orientation. Occasional self-confidence surges not seen in other models.
Likes: parties, dancing, MMA, hanging out, laughter, tequila, darts.
(5) Girly Amber. Very shy around nerdy and actually-kind-of-cool Amber.
Likes: dressing up, cupcakes, bubble baths, chocolate, decorating, happy endings.
(6) STRESSED-OUT Amber. Tyrant who, once in power, often forgets/ignores the other Ambers awaiting brainpower. Generalized ANXIETY, overinflated sense of RESPONSIBILITY, and unwarranted GUILT complex.
Likes: taking on too much, overachieving, perfection, self-sacrifice, CAPSLOCK.
(7) Robot Amber. Otherwise known as Safe Mode. Takes over once STRESSED-OUT Amber has been pushed to the breaking point. Not very personable. Has only remained in power long-term once, in the life era now referred to by all other Ambers as “The Vast Void” (v.v)
Likes: survival
So there you have it: the inside scoop behind my mind wars. Sometimes alliances are forged over commonalities, like when save-the-world Amber and girly Amber tear up together watching movies with the motif “love conquers all”. Most of the time though, it’s just one of the first five dueling STRESSED-OUT Amber while the other four cheer from the sidelines and pray that Robot Amber remains unplugged.
I’m a first time visitor Amber. It is nice to meet you, it is nice to meet you, it is nice to meet you, it is nice to meet you, it is nice to meet you, it is nice to meet you, and it was nice to meet you too!
Welcome Tom Baker! It’s a pleasure to meet you as well. Thanks for stopping by! :)
Wow, 7 different personalities! I often feel like i have 3 different ones inside my head… Maybe I’m not that crazy after all, or not the only one :-)
Only seven? I’m sure there are more, but congratulations on the clarity of your character descriptions. If you Google on, “sub-personalities,” you’ll find what you experience was articulated by a spiritually oriented contemporary of Freud and Jung named Roberto Assagioli, who founded a school of psychology called Psychosynthesis.
Another writer I like, Michael Ventura, put it like this: “The central ‘I’ is not a fact, it’s a longing – the longing of all the selves within the psyche that are starving because they are not recognized.”
Great post!
Thank you!
I finally got around to Googling that term. Sorry for the delay — I didn’t want to respond to this until I had actually done so. :) I like the concept.
Happy to hear from you again, Morgan! Hope you’ve been well.
Amber you are amazing. I love you always.
Thanks Sherri! I love you too <3 :)
Ah, are not all writers always waging a battle of wills with their split personalities? Great stuff as always. Sorry I took so long to read this… I’ve been out of pocket for a while.
HI Amber… so glad I happened upon your blog… apart from Nerdy Amber I thought you were writing about me :D love your blog. :D