wake up call

I had a dream not long ago. I haven’t stopped thinking about it. In my dream, a tree had fallen on me. I remember it slowly bearing down as I wriggled. I remember the squeezing sensation of my skull approaching its cracking point. But, most of all, I remember the horrible flight of hope. The […]

the god of now

You want me to describe my god to you? I’ll make an effort. When I was a child, I was given many things. One was a picture of god as a father and a ruler and a punisher. He helped me, in those early days, to feel safe and behave appropriately. But later, when I […]

Pennies

I don’t know why people throw away pennies, But I love finding them with you.   Since I met you, nothing feels insignificant: not pennies, not words, not blinks, not breaths.   During the past few years, my goals have simplified: do my best, be here now, make you smile, enjoy our time.   We […]

Trickery, trickery, doc.

Mary had an Instagram, Instagram, Instagram. Mary had an Instagram that nobody followed. But everywhere that Mary went, Mary went, Mary went, Everywhere that Mary went, the camera sure did go. – Jack the symbol, Jack the dick, Jack dump and dismantle chicks. – Ice cap ridges melting down, melting down, melting down, Ice cap […]

Word Value

Value of Words 1. Hate isn’t a strong word. Think about how casually everyone uses it. No words are strong anymore. Phrases might be strong, sometimes. If I say, “I hate you and I hope you die” and you know I’m not being sarcastic, then it might be considered strong phrasing. Give me a word, […]

turning 30 soon

You say, “You must feel so old!” You’re right. I suppose I must. Certainly I cannot feel “young”. I wear compression socks and like to drink hot water. Besides, I did not navigate painstakingly through infancy, toddlerhood, childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood to be called “young” now. It was hard work, aging. Maturing was even […]

10 years later

I wish I could say I forgot But I thought about it all week I remember you said I couldn’t be gay But I still am I don’t remember much of the day But I, of course, remember exactly what I was wearing I don’t remember much about you either But I remember what you […]

More Storms

I have always dreamed of storms. For years, I’ve seen them approach. They were unbearably colossal; I feared their size more than their wrath. Sudden and dreadful, they closed off the sun. I was always alone, my insides full of defeat. I dream of them still. But they are different now, as am I. I […]

I hear it now

The perfect calm of early morning silence. The symphony nature produces when uninterrupted by mundane talk. The divinity of mundane talk when murmured by a good companion. The jingle behind authentic laughter. Capable, wise discussions between intuition and knowledge – and nobody else. Unending echoes of the triumphant roar after defeating demons. Confidence; she’s loud. […]

Something Else

I begged Imagination to be something else. Be hand-eye Coordination. Be test-taking Proficiency. Be Luck. Be Charm. Be Marketability. Be not artistic, not vulnerable, not risky. It refused to be anything else (because it wanted to be everything). I tried to put it away. I tried tried to bury it in a box. I tried […]

The Urban Wilds

Outside near my office in the city, another tree just quit.  When I arrived years ago, there was one dead tree. I remember thinking it looked odd amongst the healthy, manicured ones that lined the sidewalks within perfect squares of dirt. The landscaping surprised and delighted me at first. It just makes me sad now. […]

Silent and Still

I turned my phone off. Did they think I don’t care? My mind had to rest. Very rarely do the needs, though. Best case, I worry too much; worst, I coddle and stunt. And without experiencing the consequences, It cannot follow that they’ll learn from their nightmares. Failed good intentions may have paved the way […]

slack

I wrote this some time ago, but did not publish it. I think a friend may need to read it now though. I promise it gets easier to put your insides back together, Sherri. <3 slack you never wanted to hold hands so we walked with a ribbon tied from my waist to yours when […]

parts of speech

You say you hate your voice and that makes me sad. I love your voice. Its uniqueness is one of the first things I noticed about you. I said I didn’t want to forget what you sound like but we both hate the phone, so we went on the first date. You know, you actually […]